Talking

"I want you"......
You ask me 'wen?' and I say "ALL D TIME!!".
Did I scare you, it wasn't my intention but u see
sometimes I tink I'll go bunkers if I don't.
"Was dat a sigh?" You say 'No!'
So its okay if I keep talking, its not like I can't "shut up"
but I find it necessary to talk about things, "oh, for u its different?"
Now I'm wondering "How do u get results, if u don't TALK?"
With a smile I just say "I understand wat u mean".
We are quiet now as d T.V gets d most words and I envy dem for havin a pre-written script
while I have to scratch and write my lines to our movie and see each scene goes smooth.

Sometimes it looks magnifique in my head but wen d words come out......
oh...those words come out and I look like i went out of script.
Hmm.... how do I get wat I want and say wat I want without looking to u like
an inconsiderate, annoying, unromantic, selfish B*^%h
now dat is d real JAMB question!! I'm pondering like "The Brain" but some how I'm still "Pinky".
Dis is maddness!!!!! I can't do dis!!!!! Its like thru u I see a horrible me!!!!!!
"Isn't dere a way we can both meet at the centre of sanity?"
Lets both surf d net for ideas to draft a new contract, a new guideline to life
"NO!!! I am not insane!! and of course not I'm NOT joking"
I tink "I need to sit down" so I walk to d couch and sit on d floor next to it.
This angle beta suits my mood cos I'm wondering if my perspective is "QUESTIONABLE".

Temporary relief i'll get with some sleep
and believe me I tink we could both do with some.
"Question?" and u reply 'Shoot'
I try to read from d script I have again but, I pause and decide to free flow from my heart
"I bet u want a pretty miss sunshine with most tins on the dot, but I gotta admit she isn't in here. My tins are either spontaneous,planned, outspoken,out of character, now or later but dese are my dot, like I bet u got ur dot and its different from d dot I want u to have." Now i'm sure ur blinking fast is cos u wanna get my point, well i'm saying "We got to tolerate n accomodate each odas quirks". U r looking at me and I know d chant in ur head is 'she is a lunatic and if I can only change d channel i'll watch d football match' but den u give me D Reply - 'Ok!'. I may not know wat team will win but I know who won't watch d match.
So dat brings my back to d very start - "I want u......NOW!!!"

50 tins to remember

Some of these are really worth remembering every day! If I had dese guides some years back, I tink I would have done quite a nos of tins differently. Example nos 3, 6, 9, 11, 13, 14, 15, 17, 20, 21(i still av a prob with dis), 25(it is sooooooo true), 29, 30, 31, 33, 35, 36, 41, 42 (at home i am called junk collector. I av applied dis to life too,bt i am changing), 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49 & 50.

Pls wat nos. apply to you and are u gonna make a change after reading this? Enjoy !!

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye.
16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living or get busy dying.
17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else. 20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is a special occasion.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
38. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
39. Get outside every day .
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
43. All that truly matters in the end is that you are loved.
44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
45. The best is yet to come.
46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
48. If you don't ask, you don't get.
49. Yield.
50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.
"A REAL FRIEND IS ONE WHO WALKS IN WHEN THE REST OF THE WORLD WALKS OUT"

LETS ENTER 2008 WITH JOY!!!!!!!

Hi people i am so sooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry dat I av been AWOL but work n a couple oda tins been holding d remote control of my life. I will update very soon. Thank you every1 who dropped a comment or asked about me and wished me a merry xmas - Onome, sherri,T. Stephens, Pamelastich, Lindwee, SoloD, Nyemoni,Ubong, Kreativemix, Obinwanne, Ms. emotions, Oracle, unnaked soul, princessa, Ibo dude,Ugo D and Hopeful B.
Bloggers wats ur new year resolution? Share with me, if u wanna.
Wish u all a fantasticly, intresting and successful 2008. Luv u all!!!




ASHLEIGH BRILLIANT, American writer

Sometimes I need what only you can provide, Your absence.


ANONYMOUS

· Anytime I feel like exercise, I lie down till the feeling passes.
· Eating plenty of onions and garlic might help you live longer- but you’ll probably die very lonely.
· Inside me lies a skinny woman crying to get out but I can usually shut her up with cookies.
· I am not the man I used to be, so why should I have to pay all his debts.



FIVE REASONS ALCOHOL SHOULD BE SERVED @ WORK;

· it is an incentive to show up.
· It reduces stress.
· It leads to more honest communication; employees tell management what they really think and not what management wants to hear.
· It increases satisfaction because if you have a bad job – you don’t care.
· It eliminates holidays, because people would rather come to work.

ROUTINE- YUK!!!!!!

Recently, I found out that I am stuck in the space continium of daily routine. Monday - Friday wake up 5.00am, go to work, eat, come back home, eat and sleep. Saturday hang with my man utd, neighbour and then sunday sometimes go to church then get ready for d coming week and start d boring drill all ova d hell again. AGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have had it with my predictable days, what happened to d days wen i used to go watch movies, club, hangout, visit friends, go to shows, even rent movies, make beads, write poetry etc etc (I didnt av so much $$$$$). Or those days my friend and I will dream of having our cars and we would go to the beach, spend a weekend at the hotel, travel for fun, go watch more movies, infact just have fun days and when we actually felt like staying home we would laff and remember the days gone by. I mean me sitting at home 4 friday nights in a month? Someone just hang me!!! Instead d car came, we stopped going out to movies or even clubs etc. I mean we had little money before but we would up and move into town and make sth of ourselves (feel good to a tedious week) rather dan wat we do now- sit at home and wish for tins n den beat ourselves up about where we went wrong n tins we dont have.
It sucks!!!!!!!!!!!!! It has zero % to do with age. Infact allowing age hold d remote control has tarred the road for one boring journey to life. I'm gonna do sth and I am going to take any1 who wants to hop on d wagon to change, whatever the type of change will be {even if it has to be sewing classes LOL}.
People take a look at your lives and see if u r stuck in d 5th dimension of "s%^**y routine". It has nothing to do with d money in ur pocket; sometimes all u need is d right motiviation A.k.a YOURSELF!!, a friend or two or more, positive thot and a few oda tins (positive tins) and you are breaking d yoke of a drabby life and ready to giddy yahh into happier days.

NOTE ; Why stay and worry about anything when you have God the father to cast all ur fears n worries on, all he wants you to do is have faith and then talk to him. You can just say "Father, Pls I need U. Can U hold me and kiss my pain away. (Say wat ur problem is) . I know U will make EVERYTHING WONDERFUL!! Thank U Lord!! In Jesus name I pray-Amen."

BLOGGERS ADVISORY: DO NOT DRNK AND DRIVE before una say na me tell u to have fun memorable days. If u check am, wen u drink too much n den u jam yasef enta palaver [aka accident,unsafe sex,ova speeding etc], u no go fit make new happy days. So make u carry sense enjoy ya sef, shogbo bloggers!!

Crushes!!!

Now growing up I recall the no. of crushes I had (white, black, celebrity, boy in airforce school, brother's friend, sister's friend etc). As kids and sometimes adults we were always nursing that thot, hope, butterfly and daydream that ur prince charming or for guys the lady who floats and hasn't got her feet on the ground will at least smile our way.

I was a hopeless day dreamer as a kid I had a crush on..... Tyson Beckford, Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt, Captain Von Trap (D guy in sound of music), Luther Vandross, Patrick Swayze, Eddie murphy, David hasselhoff, Billy Ocean, Ronny, Bobby, Mickky and mike (Yes! the band new edition), Johnny Depp and so the list goes on. And though I always knew there was no chance on planet Jupiter and the 3rd dimension that I would ever meet them, I burned a candel with a tinsy winsy bit of hope.

Then came the normal brodas that I was sure I could see and stood a higher chance of being involved with but I was way too young. Then as years passed there was 1 of my bro's friend that I had a crush on since Jesus was in secondary school, his name was Eddy. Oh!!! someone give me an AMEN!! in all languages cos d bro was ouch!!!!! He was about 5ft 11", Fair, nicely built and had grey eyes. I would av runaway with him If he asked me to but he neva did but I would catwalk, wriggle my skinny jones body and be so polite and helpful when he came visiting. Eddy always held my hand and called me "Lil' Sis!" cos he was my eldest bro's mate (who happens to be 10yrs older than I am). Now one day in 2002 wen I was serving I ran into Eddy and he is looking at me with bigger eye cos e don reach like 9yrs since him see me, omo guy no believe say skinny jones don turn to big girl ( i no too get curves but at least I don get extension for front n back + I don de talk mature n not like mumu I de behave like yrs ago). He was complimenting me like e just get anoiting for d job and I was sure d man de trip for me, well he started sending me recharge card, visiting my bro's house, calling, wanting to be my personal chaperon and then one day the words came "Gal u av grown so much and watching u dese few weeks has made me realise that u r a Lady and d kind I want to settle with. Wat do u tink about u and I as a couple?"

Words since 19 gogoro I don do fasting and prayers for as a kid and now see me , see him and ... and.... there were no fire works, singing choir or heavenly crowd applauding. I looked at him and he still looked OUCH!!!! but I was not able to give d reply I had practised yrs back. I asked him his age and he told me 33 going 34 (in my head d calculation no gree me hide d shock on my face cos he was 11yrs older, that difference I know fit do). I told him it was a sweet thot but like I had told him I was in a relationship and I was happy (no lie I was), Eddy's grey eyes close and den I saw crazy Eddy. The guy begin to hit hand for bed, then he got up punched wall and scattered his table and turned to me and said "but u've known me for yrs, ur boyfriend is yoruba and ur bro and I av bn friends, I am a better person". I had to do a quick turn around and said I didnt see it from dat view and he had thrown a new light to d situation and I agree with him, it was then Eddy calmed down. I den told him I needed to go home and tink of how to end it with my boyfriend so we can start our courtship, he agreed and as he offered to drop me I said I needed to go on my own cos he looked tired.

Well I neva spoke to him again, I did a major blanking of my one time crush but I was polite wen I saw him in my bros house. That was 1 crush dat went terribly wrong and till this day I wondered if he tot I was blonde and would be bullied into his arms, well dat 1 concern am. I still av crushes but now I prefer to keep it in my head but the celebrity crushes keep increasing in no. cos I know say I no go see dem lai lai to lai lai!!

Now who were ur crushes wen growing up? Did u eva get to meet celebrity or normal crushes?

Homecalling.

I moved to St Louis College from Command Secondary School and I was in J.S.S. 3a. I made friends with my classmates and a few with the other arms, but my best friend was in J.s.s 3b her name was Busola.O. We were like sisters and our friendship went on for 15yrs until saturday the 20th of october 2007. I can't believe she would av just gone like dat but its true. I was so sure it was untrue dat i called her bro n he was crying but to convince myself, I called her fone and den her landline and den her husbands mobile and dats wen it was sinking in. I got all my pics and poured it out, den selected her wedding pix to be sure who de r talking about. We were going to start a biz togeda n she called me last week tuesday for somethings and promised calling over d weekend to find out about my research and den know wat to send, but instead of busola's call I hear my girl is dead. How? Why? When? We were like two peas in a pod, I mean we call ourselves sisters cos she is d only girl. I spent my vacation in the uk with lily and den I moved later to her house and finally met my godson(who is now 1yrs old). We both did Bsc Geography and my bday was 29th aug n hers was 1st Sept and this year we were going to celebrate our 3 birthdays togeda but my boss didnt let me go and now my girl is gone? She was going to be two yrs in november being married and expecting her 2nd child by febuary and I hear she is gone. Wat of our promises, we promised to be each odas chief bridesmaid. I was hers and now she wont be mine? She was not to go anywhere till I am ready to get married, but it seems she is stone cold in a morgue? She has cheated me, cheated her son (my godson), her husband, her unborn child, her 2 brodas, her parents and all who care for her. At 29 wat d hell is ur hurry? We had issues to deal with and not for u to run off!!! I know i am so angry dat u r gone, I know I should be happy dat u r with our God and at peace but den wen do we all stop crying? I've been so scared to stay alone, I cant stop seeing u in my head? I've been crying since saturday and d tears wont stop. I went to church today and I axd God to remove my anger and be happy for u but .......... I can't believe u r gone dear, wat r we all gonna do now?Ur call is important on my bday and now u wont call me and I guess I cant call u? She is so beautiful, a real black beauty, caring, funny, crazy and....... now gone!!!


I'm not angry, I cant be, I am just sad dat u didnt fight to stay. Azuyi and now u??!!! I'm really sad u didnt stay. I'll check up on Tireni and Ade often-I promise. U too better check on dem too. You know the last words I said on our last call - I Love u and dat will neva change. I miss u and forgive me if I get angry sometimes, but its just cos....


Rest in Peace sister and say nice to God about us while u up there ok!!!

AGE

Age has grayed my hair
With a wisdom from my youth
And the feeble legs that lift me
is no match for my concrete heart.
Better judgment is like a fable
as experience is a lesson never learnt.
Religion is the great rehabilitation
that our souls rarely visit but,
what has age really done for me?
Multiplied my curiosity
Added to my conquest
Divided my attention
Whilst subtracting my intelligence.
And yet if I passed through life again,
I would surely do everything the way it is today.

ABC's

ACCOMPLISHMENTS: well...em....i got my place and a moto and... etc etc (i wonder wat etc is?) BIRTHDAY: August 29
CONFUSED ABOUT: men.
DRINK YOU LAST HAD: red wine
EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO: Myself
FAVORITE MUSIC/GROUP/BAND:Last night/
GOOD OR NAUGHTY: hmm... I'm naughtily good (I say dats a sentence)
HOMETOWN: Orlu, Imo State
INSTRUMENT: I love the guitar (but can't play)
JOB POSITION: Customer Support Officer
KILLED SOMEONE: HELL NO!!!
LONGEST CAR RIDE: From Jos to Imo state (Naija)
MILKSHAKE FLAVOR: strawberry (but water is better)
NUMBER OF PETS: none
ONE WISH: that i could own my own successful business and be a social butterfly
PERSON WHO YOU LAST TALKED TO: the companies's sick accountant
QUIET OR LOUD: Most people would probably say Loud but i'm really quiet.
REASONS TO SMILE: God, my family, manutd, friends SINGLE: Nope
TIME YOU WOKE UP: 5.09am
UNDERWEAR: I wear them
VIOLENT: physical - no, but my thots are very explosive.
WORST HABIT: I am d queen of scattered-dom
X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD: my tooth
YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL: dogs but puppies to be precise
ZODIAC SIGN: Virgo

ITS MINE!!!

Yes there she is...my beauty!!!! I tink she is ...(sob, sob) the proudest lil' girl any1 can buy from squeezing an account. (Wen i am a social butterfly and a biggggg girl i'll buy my one true love Landrover jeep(star struk!!!))

I've been cruising the 3rd mainland bridge since monday morning and today, I felt no jitter - wat i mean is usually wen i get to the office i av a little fear thingy were I hold my breath from home to d office and then wen i finally start breathing, I've lost my voice. Yep, I de fear small small but e no reach to piss for body. Today I felt good about driving my baby and this evening as I cruise the highway homebound, the song in my head will be "They see me rolling, they hating ....bla blaa try to catch me riding dirty repeat 2ce....etc. "

Now I got a moto d next tin on the list is knowing the roads of lasgigi and paint the town plum ..uhh.... sassy!!!!

Thanks manutd (U know what for)

He Didn't forget.

I wake each day to his rotten breath
of excessive liquor and cigarette smoke
as i pick myself up to composure
and anger mingled with disgust chokes me
as I recall a time when things weren't so.
By day he's got a job quite alright
and a hobby for the night,
if its not the booze or the smoke
then it's my silent cries for the moment
to have never happened at all.

This revolting pile of shit
was once a prince and then my king
but somehow I lost his highness
to the stupidity and disgust of irresponsibility.
It's a question - Why do I stay
and outside the window lies my freedom
but it's hard to explain to you all
that after it all,
he hasn't forgotten to tell me every night
that he LOVES me very, very much.

{Fiction}